He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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