apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
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