Fine. I'll sleep in my office
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
