What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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