You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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