o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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