I'm eating all of the evidence.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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