Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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