can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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