this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
