We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize