I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
