small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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