never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
