The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Actions speak louder than pants.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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