So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
