you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
