So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
