I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
