I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
