He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
