What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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