Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize
