The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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