I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
