I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
