sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize