apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
