Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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