I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Damn victory sex feels great
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize