Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
