i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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