so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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