The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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