my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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