I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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