Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.

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(757): View more from Virginia

You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.

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(804): View more from Virginia

god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(304): View more from West Virginia

His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"

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(757): View more from Virginia

he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire

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(716): View more from New York

Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?

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(336): View more from North Carolina

You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.

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