can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Randomize
