i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
