i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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