I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
