Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
