ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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