I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
