She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
