i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's great music for shaving your balls
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize