My room smells like vodka and shame
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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