yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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