so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize