Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
