I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
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