If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
